During an assisted living move, keep your parent's phone number and email working, because they are the recovery keys to almost every other account. Make an account inventory together. Use the help features services offer, like Gmail delegation, an Apple account recovery contact or a brokerage trusted contact, instead of sharing passwords. Put a PIN on the phone account, and agree on one family rule for unexpected calls about money or computers.
Your dad's phone is on a family plan you've never seen, his email password is on a sticky note in the kitchen, and the bank texts a code every time he logs in. Now he's moving, the landline is being canceled, and the kitchen is being packed. This is the moment accounts get lost, or taken over. This post covers what to protect first, how to get legitimate access without borrowing his identity, and how to make the move less attractive to scammers. For the devices and Wi-Fi in the new apartment, see phone, tablet and Wi-Fi for a parent in assisted living.
The phone number and email are the keys
Many accounts reset a forgotten password through a text message or an email. Lose the phone number or the email, and every account tied to them gets harder to recover. That's why the first rule of a move is simple: don't cancel, change or let lapse your parent's mobile number or main email address until every account that uses them has been updated.
Watch for three common traps during a move:
- A canceled landline that a bank still uses for voice verification codes.
- A new phone or carrier set up in a rush, before sign-in codes and apps are moved over.
- An old internet provider's email address (the kind tied to a cable or phone company) that disappears when the house's service is canceled. Check this one before you cancel anything at the old house.
Make the account inventory together
Sit down with your parent, in person or on video, and list every account that matters. Their involvement is the point: these are their accounts, and they know which ones they actually use.
| Account | Sign-in email or username | Codes go to | Who can help | Action before the move |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Mobile phone carrier | Account holder | Account PIN | Plan owner | Add PIN; confirm who pays |
| Main email | Address | Mobile number | Delegate, if offered | Update recovery phone and email |
| Apple or Google account | Address | Trusted devices, number | Apple: recovery contact | Apple: add a recovery contact. Google: check the recovery phone and email |
| Bank and credit cards | Username | Text or app | Agent under power of attorney | Ask the bank about agent access and alerts |
| Brokerage and retirement | Username | Text or app | Trusted contact; agent | Add a trusted contact |
| my Social Security, Medicare | Username | Text or app | Parent | Update address after the move |
| Pharmacy, patient portals | Username | Text or email | Proxy access, if offered | Ask each about family access |
| Streaming, shopping, social media | Username | Parent | Update address; cancel unused |
Store the inventory securely, in a password manager or a sealed envelope in a locked place, not a shared document anyone can open. The CFPB's guide for agents warns against sharing account numbers or passwords unless you know whom you're dealing with and why they need them.
What to say
"Dad, with the move, a lot of your accounts are going to ask for codes at the wrong moment. Can we spend half an hour listing them, so if you ever get locked out I know where to start? You keep the passwords; I just want to know what's there." Asking for the map rather than the keys is easier to agree to.
Help features that beat sharing passwords
Some services let an account owner name a helper without handing over the account. Use these first:
- Gmail delegation. Google lets an account owner add delegates who can read, send and delete email for them. Delegates can't change the password or chat. A personal account can have up to 10 delegates; the owner adds them from Gmail settings on a computer, the delegate must accept within a week, and access can take up to 24 hours to start.
- Apple account recovery contact. Apple lets a person choose up to five recovery contacts who can give them a code to reset a forgotten password. A recovery contact gets no access to the account itself. Both people need recent software and iMessage turned on.
- Brokerage trusted contact. FINRA, the SEC and NASAA describe a trusted contact as someone the firm may contact in limited circumstances, such as suspected exploitation. It gives no power to see balances or make trades.
- Bank and billing access. For money, ask each bank how an agent under a power of attorney can view or manage the account. The full money setup is in managing a parent's bills from far away.
Protect the phone number
The FTC describes the SIM swap scam: a scammer convinces a phone company they are the customer, gets the number moved to their own phone, and then receives the sign-in codes meant for your parent. The FTC's advice:
- Set up a PIN or password on the phone account, which can help protect it from unauthorized changes. Check the carrier's website for how.
- Use stronger sign-in for sensitive accounts. Text message codes may not stop a SIM swap; the FTC suggests an authentication app or security key where possible.
- Know the warning sign: a phone that suddenly has no service, calls or texts, or a notice that the SIM was activated on a new device. Contact the carrier immediately, then change passwords and check financial accounts.
Also make sure the phone bill keeps getting paid after the move. A number that is disconnected for nonpayment causes the same lockout as a stolen one.
Scam-proof the move
A move produces exactly the messages scammers imitate: account notices, delivery alerts, calls about bills. The FTC's four signs of a scam are worth printing for your parent: someone pretends to be from an organization you know, says there's a problem or a prize, pressures you to act immediately, and tells you to pay in a specific way, such as gift cards, wire transfers, payment apps or cryptocurrency.
Tech support scams deserve a special mention. The FTC says legitimate tech companies won't contact you by phone, email or text about a problem with your computer, and real security pop-ups never ask you to call a phone number. Scammers ask for remote access, then for payment.
Agree on one family rule: "If anyone contacts you out of the blue about money, your accounts or your computer, hang up and call me. I'll never be upset that you checked." Write it on a card by the phone in the new apartment.
When your parent can no longer manage accounts
If your parent's memory or health means they can't manage their accounts, resist the shortcut of simply logging in as them. The CFPB's guide for agents says to act as agent openly, for example by signing as "Jane Doe, as agent for Mary Doe," never just your parent's name. The same principle applies online: ask each provider what it needs from an authorized representative, and keep a record of what you did and why. If there is no power of attorney in place, power of attorney before an assisted living move explains the conversation to have while your parent can still make the decision.
Keep the everyday digital life going too: photo sharing, video calls and email with grandchildren matter as much as the bank. Staying close to a parent in assisted living from far away covers that side.
The account checks, scheduled before the landline goes
Parent Move Plan puts the phone, email and account tasks on real dates counted back from move-in day, so nothing gets canceled before the accounts that depend on it are updated. It is a Google Sheet the whole family can open.
Build your plan in 2 minutesFrequently asked questions
Should I know my elderly parent's passwords?
Only with their agreement, and ideally not for money accounts. Where services offer a way for a trusted person to help, such as Gmail delegation or an Apple account recovery contact, use that instead of sharing a password. For banks and brokerages, ask about acting as agent under a power of attorney rather than logging in as your parent.
How can I help my parent with email without their password?
Gmail lets an account owner add delegates who can read, send and delete email on their behalf, but can't change the password or chat. A personal Gmail account can have up to 10 delegates. Your parent adds you from Gmail's settings on a computer, and you accept the invitation within a week.
What happens if my parent's phone number stops working?
Many accounts send sign-in codes by text, so a lost or canceled number can lock your parent out of email, banking and more. Keep the number active through the move, keep the bill paid, and add a PIN to the phone account. The FTC suggests that PIN, plus an authentication app or security key for sensitive accounts, to guard against SIM swap scams.
How do I protect my parent from tech support scams?
The FTC says legitimate tech companies won't contact you by phone, email or text to say there's a problem with your computer, and real security warnings never ask you to call a number. Agree with your parent that they will hang up on any such caller and call you instead, and never give anyone remote access to their computer.
Sources
- Google: Gmail Help, Delegate and collaborate on email (accessed Sept 2026)
- Apple Support: Set up a recovery contact for your Apple Account (accessed Sept 2026)
- FTC: SIM Swap Scams, How to Protect Yourself (accessed Sept 2026)
- FTC: How To Spot, Avoid, and Report Tech Support Scams (accessed Sept 2026)
- FTC: How To Avoid a Scam (accessed Sept 2026)
- FINRA, SEC and NASAA: Investor Bulletin, Why You Should Consider Adding a Trusted Contact to Your Account (accessed Sept 2026)
- Consumer Financial Protection Bureau: Managing Someone Else's Money, Help for agents under a durable power of attorney (Florida edition) (accessed Sept 2026)